Monday, December 31, 2012
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Wendy And Tink
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Of course I like to think that I'm grown up emotionally. By choice, however, I've never seen any reason to let go of a lot of my childhood. I play rock'n'roll. I do it for the joy that it brings me. I like to think that I help put a little something in other people's lives every now and then, too.
No kid would ever hurt an animal. None of us would have ever eaten our first hotdog if mom had told us up front what it was. We had it right.
As boys we all liked to play war or cowboys and indians. That's my cousin, Jimmy, and me in some of our less formal cowboy getups. As soon as I put a few facts together and figured out what we had done to the Native Americans I turned away from the cowboy culture. You'll never convince me that Roy or Gene or Hoppy would have ever hurt innocent people. I didn't get any of those facts from the teachers at school, either, I might add.
If kids were running our government right now I'm sure that we wouldn't always be on the verge of invading anyone else. We might not balance any budget right away but we surely wouldn't be withholding financial support for people in need. Not just to reward cheaters and liars any way.
Seems that my emotional development peaked around the time that I found out how much fun it is to be with girls. Once again, I had it right. I see the world through the same eyes that I did as a young boy. I'm glad of it. It's a beautiful world. Sometimes grownups botch things up. They mean well.
I love you.
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Who Needs Friends
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I have a big karmic debt. I owe a lot of love. I will start by loving everyone who has ever been in my life and I'll try my best to be on the lookout for anyone who needs me. Love changes everything.
Friday, December 28, 2012
Load 'em Up
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These idiots in D.C. are playing these stupid games to satisfy their egos and fluff their constituencies while the rest of us are being marched over this cliff that they designed. Their taxes aren't going up. They're not going to miss a paycheck.
I'm always going on about peace and love and working for the higher levels. Still am. We can't just ignore these arrogant fools while we work to save the planet, though. They're the same jackasses who march our children off to wars, prevent our citizens from marrying, plot with the NRA to put guns in our schools, butt into women's reproductive rights and pal around with the likes of Trump, Abramoff and Norquist. I don't mean for this to sound like a rant against one of these two parties. It's merely that one of them is even crazier than the other just now.
I've got a fire in my heart and another one in my head. Do your burning in those places. Fight your battles with love.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Ants And Magnifying Glasses
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Fine, Fine, Fine
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Blowin' In The Sand
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Really I have no interest in practicing being good. I just want to be good. For years I described myself as an addictive personality. Seemed right. Now I suppose that it was just a romantic image. I seem to be the opposite. That's not being good. That's biology, genetics. Good fortune.
When it comes to the other biological urges, count me in. I have some theories about all of that. If there is no divine plan then it doesn't matter. If there is then sex must have been a big part of the design. Again, I must be very lucky that nothing that appeals to me is illegal. Not now, not here. Let me add, if I haven't mentioned it often enough, that almost everything appeals to me. Whoopee!
The scientist describes it as physics and chemistry and biology. The poet sees it in terms of the heart and the soul. I get it all mixed up. I always have. I see it all in terms of love.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Holidays
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If you love, you win. If you get rich, that's great. It's not important, though. Not unless you do wonderful things with your riches.
Somehow it seems all the more obvious this time of year. Happy holidays. I love you.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
Who put the benzedrine...
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As the last great love of my life strolled out she asked what I was planning to do. When I replied that I wasn't sure but that I knew that I was interested in sex but couldn't imagine a relationship she replied,"That's called dating, Ronny."
Well, not for me. I'm a fool for love and I always have been. Sitting at a table next to Lucinda Williams one time she described a former drummer as cute. "I didn't have to marry him. I'm over cute!" It's not an exclusive club, I suppose.
My only interest in making love requires love. Seems obvious by definition to me. Here's the hitch. I've had to live this long to figure any of this out, even a little bit. I love people. I mean I really, really love people. I can't marry every woman I love. Alright, I know what you're thinking. It's true, I'm off to a pretty good start.
Somehow the notion that there is something wrong with sex outside of committed relationships was etched far too effectively in my young Sunday school brain. I'm not looking for any one night stand. I'm not really opposed to the concept. It just doesn't appeal to me all that much. I surely don't have any interest in talking anybody into anything.
I just always seem to get back to the bonobo concept of "sex is good." I hope to come back, pardon the pun, as a bonobo.
I'm pretty sure that it was Roger Miller who wrote the heartbreakingly beautiful song, "The Last Word In Lonesome Is Me." I'm not as clever as Roger Miller. It's obvious to me that the next to last word in lonesome is some. I want to get me some. I know, I know; I said that I didn't want to be crude and here I am: crude.
You're not supposed to tell people this kinda' stuff. All the therapists that I've ever been dragged to love me. I'll tell anybody anything. I saw the first one that I ever worked with about a week ago. I miss her. You're gonna have to do.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Changes Coming
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Friday, December 21, 2012
Season For Peace, Season For Love
Thursday, December 20, 2012
Our Song
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At different times I've had women in my life who announced to me, "That's our song."I still struggle with the concept of the love of my life and still work hard to dream some order into a chaotic heart and mind.
It must be wonderful to have a song with somebody.
Wednesday, December 19, 2012
End Of The World- Ho, Ho, Ho
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
Holiday Cheer
Monday, December 17, 2012
Tight Grip
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Attachment. Yeah, I know all about it. Too much, in fact. I would like to love without attachment. I haven't figured it out.
Sunday, December 16, 2012
Hippies And Love And Stuff
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Instead of worrying about the past some kind of muscle memory provides me with the euphoria of some kid in love for the first time. I'm glad that I can't seem to learn not to touch the hot stove. I wouldn't want to have missed anything.
Sometimes when your heart has been broken I suppose that it's normal to question what you've been through. Now, here I am. I have loved.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
Re-Wire
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We use the image of the historic Jesus to support wars and profit. After Sunday school age you don't hear much about this Prince of Peace thing.
It has to start with you. That's right. I'm preaching to you.
Friday, December 14, 2012
No Good War, No Good Gun
When free, brave folks stand up to these bullies we will join the rest of the civilized world and get rid of this cowboy reputation. Personally, I see no reason to join in calling everyone who disagrees with me a moron. There's a revolution of love coming. For a lot of families in Connecticut tonight it's not coming soon enough.
Thursday, December 13, 2012
Which Lion?
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I've had two friends tell me lately how sad it is to know that you will never be in love again. That's really just too tragic to consider.
Live to love again.
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
Crazy Love
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Having lived a free and open life and being considered eccentric for most of my life I've often joked of being "crazy." Calling any friend or relative crazy has never been considered an insult. At least I've never meant it to be insulting.
Over the last several years I have seen mental illness and it has changed my perception of life. Now I see signs of it that I would have missed or overlooked before. I express this idea to friends and most of them are surprised at my naiveté.
Of course I know that there are genetic causes and environmental hitches and chemical imbalances that twist the logic of lots of folks out there. Sad as that is, I am more disturbed by the idea that a lot of the mental issues that individuals face comes from never having felt loved.
You don't have to be wealthy to do your part. If you're busy, that just provides more opportunity. Love. Love a lot. It's the best investment out there.
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
I Get It
That was a few years ago. Sorta' leaves Karen looking politically incorrect and me looking like some kind of knight on a white horse. That, of course, is not accurate. Karen was a feminist before the term was thrown around and I was always... well, stupid.
Now, a thunderbolt. In the design we've been taught that self preservation is the strongest of our urges and the ones regarding the continuation of the species are the most powerful of those. Damn. I'm not just stupid. I'm slow.
Sex. I live for sex. Well, now it occurs to me that we all live for sex. All of my dreams have always centered around doing dirty things. Enjoying them, too! Somehow in our semi-puritanical society I have bumbled through with the idea that the other team's goal was to avoid sex with the likes of me. That would be horny, red blooded males. While I always hoped for victory I was never going to cheat or lie to get there.
Outside of Marriage And Family at Wilson Junior High my background in the birds and the bees came from Ozzie and Harriet and an occasional issue of Cavalier bought over the counter at Richards' Drug Store. I thought "Baby, It's Cold Outside" presented the classic battle. You know, the man begging politely until, if lightning strikes, the woman caves.
All of my courting and dating, wining, dining and marrying have been about sex. I thought it was about love. Romance. Don't misunderstand me. I fall in love. Harry says that I fall fast and I fall hard. Yeah, I guess that's right.
My point, if I have a point, is that I have not played well. Partly because I didn't understand the game. I have disappointed women who are smarter than I am. Karen knew.
Monday, December 10, 2012
Drain Blood, Patch Heart, Refill
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Every situation that has ever left me feeling alone and blue has been my own doing. I have no people who have come through my life and hurt me and I've never really been a victim. I'm gonna have to find a whole new identity. Let's face it, I've gotten pretty good at this.
The freedom that comes with this discovery is almost overpowering. I know that I have been worrying more lately about the harm that I've done than the slights that I have incurred but this is different. I can live a life now with a purpose; make up for it.
My heart is light. It's supposed to be this way. On my knees, I ask you to forgive me if I have ever hurt you. I guess this is my letter to the world.
Sunday, December 9, 2012
Real Art
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I don't buy it. Well, literally, of course. I never have any money. The concept makes no sense to me. I may be slow but I'm pretty sure the emperor has no clothes on. I see his talleywhacker.
There are beautiful, shimmering chunks and slivers of broken 7 Up bottles in most gutters. Nobody needs to point out to me that these pieces of trash rival rare emeralds that folks are killed over. They're free for the taking. Nobody wants anything that we can't agree has value.
Me? I suppose I'm something of an aesthete. Little bit of a snob about it, too, I suppose. I've seen oil slicks in the gutter after a rain that have taken my breath away.
I hope it rains today. Share your love. Give it away. That's valuable.
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Mining The Joy
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The burning's in the heart, in the soul. I've got a lot of livin' to do. A whole lot.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Life: It Was A Magazine
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Stand up for peace. Point out injustice. Speak for the ones without a voice, not just the humans.
You define success.
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Sweet Gene- What They Remember
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The airline had lost his luggage so he was without his beloved "leathers." He just didn't feel like a rock'n'roll star out there in that mustard colored coat and black bell bottoms. By the next night the missing suitcase had caught up with us and Gene took the stage in his proper black attire. A different person, he tore the walls down.
There are lots of stories out there about guns and craziness and Gene certainly had a taste for the whisky. When the dust settles, literally, it's all about what they remember. Be-Bop-A-Lula.
Wednesday, December 5, 2012
Death As A Career Move
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
Congratulations. You're The Underdog
I've always been for the underdog. When Castro rode into Havana on the front end of a tank and Ed Sullivan cut to the scene live I was fascinated. What could have been more exciting than watching young Cassius Clay whip the daylights out of Sonny Liston?
I played psychedelic rock'n'roll until Jimi emerged. When I played on a show with him I played in my first country rock'n'roll group, Your Local Bear. By the time that southern California thing happened I had moved on. I guess I still want to do whatever you shouldn't.
All of this comes to mind because I seem to have lived my life in much the same manner. I've zigged when zagging was the fashion. I have pioneered new dimensions in failure, personal and business.
Now here I am. I've fought hard for this spot. I'm not about to screw it up by rolling into Havana or knocking some big, mean guy down. No hit records, either. I have no act. This is me. I like it here.
Monday, December 3, 2012
Writer's Block
I remember reading an interview with Chuck Berry when I was a kid where he turned aside a compliment about being the genius who invented rock'n'roll by insisting that he had only written a couple of songs. At the time I thought that my hero was just being humble and shy. Of course I found out over time that Chuck is neither humble or shy.
It took me years to figure out that I've only written two or three things. Then I write 'em again. Sometimes you just don't have anything to say.
Sunday, December 2, 2012
A History Of Hate
Somehow we are left with the gifts of W.E.B. Dubois, Duke Ellington, Spencer Williams, Ernie Barnes and so many without names now. We have rock'n'roll and we have jazz, sometimes referred to as the only American art form.
It's a shameful smear on our society that we allowed open bigotry in this country for such a long time. The fact that we gained so much from these victims is ironic and sweet. Peace and love is hard work.
Saturday, December 1, 2012
The Good Stuff
Bad way to be reminded of an important lesson. It's all about loss and most of it is not important. Some of it is. Spend the necessary time working on your IRA but never the time that you could be loving.
Friday, November 30, 2012
Waiting. Is That My Bus?
Always thought I was stronger than this. What's worse is that I never knew that I was crazy. Oh, I knew that all my pals thought so but I just thought that they were tuned into a different station.
Yeah, I wait. Only because I can't seem to find an option. She tried to make it easy. Not for my sake. That's just the way she does it. What time is it now?
Thursday, November 29, 2012
If You Need Me
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
No Borders, Color Outside The Lines
All these concepts and rules, made up by folks with their own shortcomings, their own agendas. Does it sound like I'm preaching anarchy here? I'm not. I'm aware that Grover Norquist would come to my house and steal my wallet if he didn't have to face the law. Bad guys are just bad guys. Most bad folks figure out at an early age to seek power. That way you get to impose your own rules, your own boundaries. God is on our side. The meek shall not inherit the earth. That's a rumor that Grover and Ralph Reed and Jack Abramoff cooked up when they roomed together in college.
Aunt Wilma had me color Hopalong's kerchief a bright chartreuse. She didn't scold me for coloring outside the lines, either. That was the best that I could do.
There are no borders. There are no lines. I don't begin where you end, we exist together.
Love. There's a concept that's real. I can get behind that one. Peace? That's the natural state of things. Take off your clothes and put 'em in the corner. Welcome to the Garden of Eden.
Tuesday, November 27, 2012
Duckbutter? Hey, Duckbutter!
The Cadillacs broke up after years of chart success and Speedo sang bass and played first clown with the Coasters for years until there was no audience left for their art.
In 1969 when Richard Nader put together the first rock'n'roll revival for Madison Square Garden it became obvious that there was a long line waiting to see the artists who had brought us the beauty and the joy of a lifetime.
Soon after we were touring with Nader's package of Chuck Berry, Bill Haley and the Comets, Bo Diddley, Gene Vincent and yep, the Coasters. Besides our set we backed up Chuck, Gene and the Coasters. What a dream.
On the second night in Orlando I was undressing for bed in my motel room when I heard a whisper in the hallway. "Duckbutter? Hey Duckbutter!"
I opened my door to find Speedo walking the halls trying to find any one of his new friends. He explained that the boys were having a little party down in one of their rooms and they thought that we might like to join in. Probably my proudest moment.
I got dressed and hurried with him back to the party. There, crammed into one small room was the entire group and three or four pretty young girls. White girls. It was several years before it occurred to me why the guys wanted us at the party.
After a short time it was fairly obvious that there would be no debauchery and no wild tales to tell later. I asked, "Speedo, are you hungry?"
"I'm so hungry if I put a biscuit on my head my tongue would beat my brains out," he replied. Most of everything he said sounded like a line from a Leiber and Stoller song.
We stumbled out to the elevator, somewhat impaired, and attempted to find something to sustain us. We went to our rooms hungry. God bless Speedo.
Monday, November 26, 2012
Go On, Take It
Oh yeah, Chuck Berry invented rock'n'roll and he had songs ripped off by the Beatles and the Beach Boys among others, right? Well, yeah. Of course he had taken a truckload from one of his idols, Louis Jordan. Louis stole plenty, he said so. Chuck's first record, Maybelline, was a boogied up version of Bob Wills' Ida Red. To further complicate matters, Woody Guthrie recorded a version of Ida Red before Bob Wills did.
It's mirrors held up in front of mirrors from here on out. It's what Woody referred to as the "folk tradition."
Now when it comes to The Twist there are lots of stories. They don't all match up. Problem is lots of them came from Hank Ballard, himself. Hmm...
Hank frequently mentioned What'cah Gonna Do, the Drifters' hit, as an inspiration for the melody and the song structure. He also told the tale that Brother Joe Wallace from the gospel group, the Sensational Nightingales, had brought the original song idea to him and Cal Green, the Midnighters' guitarist. He always stuck to the idea that he had seen kids in Tampa dancing in a club and had asked a young girl in the crowd just what they were doing. "The Twist," she replied. None of the rest of it matters.
There are only so many notes and so many ideas. Help yourself, please.
Sunday, November 25, 2012
The Grown Up Table
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Maybe I should have reserved more room in my heart for joy. That way when sadness came calling it would have found no vacancy.
Oh, I have my happiness. I don't suppose I would trade my happy memories for anything. To have laughed as hard as I have, as often as I have, is worth several fortunes.
To those I have laughed with and those I have cried with and those that I have loved, thank you.
Saturday, November 24, 2012
Fuschia Saturday
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The flames of romance have singed my soul and I haven't missed much. I wish I could trade regrets for plastic beads, though. I never learn. Now I'm bragging!
Friday, November 23, 2012
What If I Change My Mind
Thursday, November 22, 2012
Grandma's Turn
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Plenty of folks out there are hungry. Share the love in your heart with someone who needs it. Take care of the planet. Adopt a stray. I don't mean to be bossy, I just want to remind you of your power. Love is the tool.
Wednesday, November 21, 2012
When I Get Rich
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I've picked watermelons in the rain, scooped mud from the bottom of barges and checked the oil and water and washed the windshields.
The secret of life is that there is no secret. This is it. Me? I'm pretty sure that it's heaven. Oh, you can make it hell. I know. I have.
I just listened in on a conversation at the diner. The three yuppies were making homeless jokes. I'm not using the term, yuppie, in a derogatory fashion. I'm pretty sure that if I eavesdropped on a conversation with three homeless folks this morning that odds are good that there wouldn't be much praise of the yuppies.
We're all good people. Really good people. Some of us just need to exercise the heart muscle a little more. Oxygen for the lungs, love for the heart.
All of you who know me know that I'm never going to be rich. Not in money. That's good. I don't need anything. That dog doesn't need a new collar and I don't want to be playing with my i phone while someone is talking to me at the breakfast table.
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Pilgrims And Indians And Love
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Now I don't like to miss a chance to carp. I can whine with the best of them. Somehow though, this year, I am almost overcome with love and gratitude and, yep, thanksgiving. I miss so many of the beautiful people who have passed through my life but somehow I'm focused on the wonderful memories of having shared parts of their lives. I love everyone I have ever known and I feel like I owe all of mankind something. A lot.
That doesn't cover it. All of the beautiful animals who have graced my life have provided enormous comfort and love for me, too. I owe them all something.
I'm gonna write you all some really pretty songs. Well, as pretty as I can write. Is this hokey? Yeah, you bet. Has the old fool lost what little mind he might ever have had? Who cares.
In my life, over the years, I have met a few individuals who radiated what seemed to be pure love. Tiny Tim was one. He spoke to me without any sign of irony or embarrassment of love and mothers and heaven. Keep in mind that our friendship was the fifteen minute type relationship and in a loud, crowded room, too. I never doubted the love or the sincerity, though. Real is real.
I love you all.
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