Thursday, March 14, 2024

I Don't Play Frumps or Virgins





We're all going to end up with the same prize. We might as well have some fun along the way. Everyone eventually discovers that there is a "worry quota" that can't be denied. Let's face it, if they hadn't set up the customer call centre somewhere in the middle of India, you would have some other monumental crisis to fill your day.

Remind yourself of the miracles. Keep in mind that you've never experienced anyone who was too kind. Don't take anyone or anything too seriously, but don't take anyone for granted.

If you don't believe in magic, maybe you should get up in time for the sunrise tomorrow. If you don't believe in ghosts, maybe you should spend some time remembering that last dog. The one before, too.

As you can see, spell check has continued to "correct" some of my gibberish into the proper British form
and not the rest, so that I come across as a half-literate imbecile regardless of where you read this dribble. There- now I have something to worry about for the next little while.

Give us peace on earth and end this dreadful, dreadful war.





 

Sunday, March 10, 2024

Heartstung

 



The folks who make the rules make rules for the folks who make the rules. Majorities don't always decide. The trick would seem to be to convince the masses that your concern is for them.

Seems to me that, unless you're born to the ruling class, the only way to win is to refuse to play. Oh, you can marry into it, or you can grovel and claw your way in. Even then, you're not really one of them, are you?

Your kids won't really be in the club, either. Their kids might, if everybody keeps his eye on the ball. 

Here's the good news for the rest of you- They don't have the best parties or the dirtiest sex. They will overpay for Levis with the knees worn out and Stratocasters with the finish worn off for authenticity.

This is not some new phenomena. There's an ebb and a flow. Your best bet is probably to trade them some magic beans for their family cow. That, or sell them your beat up old Stratocaster on Ebay.

Give us peace on earth and end this dreadful, dreadful war.







Wednesday, March 6, 2024

The Difference Between Whining and Winning




How can I possibly live "in the moment" if I am always paying attention to the command, "wait for it," on some social media post? More often than not the cat just falls off the counter top.

In my world, irreverence trumps gravitas every time.

Try to have fun while you save the world and always be kind. How hard can it be?






 

Thursday, February 29, 2024

Crank Case Goo

 




I read the news today, oh boy! Is it me or is the world crumbing? Of course, I would love to think that it's just humans. We seem to have decided to take polar bears, most orchids and 90% of the insects with us. Now, I've lived through assassinations, doomsday scenarios and the end of rock'n'roll. This seems, somehow, sadder.

Probably my scariest scenario has always been that I would find it all, right at the end. 

Well, dear friends- I seem to have found it all. 

Give us peace on earth and end this dreadful, dreadful war.





Monday, February 19, 2024

Allow Us To Choose For You

 




Bomb shelters, face masks, race riots and polio. If you're not afraid, you're not paying attention. Governments and religions rely on you remaining insecure enough to pay through the nose for protection. Of course, not everyone pays his share.

Adam and Eve were doing fine until that blasted snake brought that confound apple to the dinner party. They learned that they were naked and that they were gonna kick the bucket at some point. What a party, huh? Gimme a break! I'm from Alabama and I know when I'm naked and I'm well aware of my mortality.

The secret is that there is no secret. Knock yourself out. Hold hands when you can. Eat cake for breakfast and laugh when you get a chance. It's never inappropriate. Tell 'em I said so. Cry if you need to, or rather, when you need to. It's okay. This is it, dear friend- don't miss a minute.






Friday, February 16, 2024

Blue and Gray Skies




Programmed to worry about something, peace of mind is a task for all of us. If you're lucky enough to figure it out, you've got it made. That, or you're just shiftless and lazy. Either way, pal, it's just semantics.

You know the end. Everything up to that point is up to you. Well, up to you and luck, I suppose. You of the religious ilk will dispute this part. 

Me, I'm eating Valentine candy as if it's going out of style and making plans for sunny weather. Trust me. Have I ever lied to you?

Give us peace on earth and end this dreadful, dreadful war.





 

Sunday, January 28, 2024

Mad Englishmen and Dogs



For some of us it's hard to accept that there is no hurry. I don't know where we're going but I'm pretty sure we're all going to the same place. The very idea that old men continue to trick young men into fighting breaks my heart. Oh, I remember when I had such high hopes for mankind. That was, of course, all before Milli Vanilli.

Time marches in that one direction and I continue to have everything I've ever wanted. When they tell you to be careful what you wish for, just ignore them. They're the same ones who told you that the meek will inherit the earth.

Don't trade your soul for green paper, either. Slow down. Enjoy dreams. Love wildly, carelessly.

Give us peace on earth and end this dreadful, dreadful war.