They baptized me a Methodist but I really grew up in the Church of Celebrity. Oh, I loved Jesus, alright, but he was only a rank or two above Elvis. While I'm confessing, none of them could ever hold a candle to Brigitte Bardot.
My religion came to me honestly, passed down from my mom. Trying to make sense of it all now, she dreamed of Hollywood and Nashville. I suppose my arrival sealed those dreams. Birmingham was gonna have to do.
Here's a tip- if you've got stars in your eyes, you should probably get out of Birmingham. Now, me- I've got a college degree in geography. I feel qualified to tell you that you can substitute Tampa for Birmingham.